How to improve social skills - Disagreeing

Aspies often appear very opinionated, confrontational and aggressive because they state opinions and disagree using direct language. This may make Non- autistics feel that their opinion is being dismissed which makes them feel negative towards you. When non-autistics disagree they tend to soften their disagreements using similar phrases to those below (either by partially agreeing, expressing doubt or other phrase to soften the disagreement.

Acknowledge the other person's opinion first before offering an alternative viewpoint. This enables non-Aspies to understand that you are not dismissing their opinions out of hand 

Partial agreement 
  • I agree with you to a point, but....
  • I see what you are saying but....
  • I understand what you are saying however....
  • I understand where you are coming from however ......
  • That's a valid point but .......
Disagreeing using general doubt
  • I wonder if its true that...
  • I am not sure it can work like that
  • I'm not sure whether its possible ...
  • I don't think that is such a good idea
  • I don't think I can agree with you
  • I am not sure it is the best idea
  • I am not so sure about that
Softening disagreements 
  • I don't think I have the same opinion as you
  • I'm sorry but I disagree with you about this
  • I'm afraid I disagree
  • Well in my opinion, ... 
  • Sorry but I really can't agree to that
  • I'm not sure that I agree with you about this
  • I can’t go along with that
  • I beg to differ
  • We don’t see eye to eye on that
  • I don't see it that way

AVOID NEGATIVES and put downs such as the following
  • That's a bad idea
  • That's the worst idea
  • I disagree with you
  • That's a stupid idea


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Giving Opinions

Mirroring (Non-verbal and Non-literal conversations)